Before I fill you in on the Lock & Load GameFest 2016 cosplay contest I emceed, let me note: my introductory WARMACHINE joke was killer. Never mind the groans from the audience, the warning headshake from my alleged moral support friend, or the stony silence that followed the punchline. It was still a mike-drop moment. And never mind that my name is “Mike.”

That said, the rest of the cosplay contest on Saturday night was equally killer—and heavily populated by Protectorate types.

Deadpool was clearly out of his element at a Privateer Press con, but we’re an all-inclusive community, so he had a moment in the spotlight. Just the same, he couldn’t hold a candle to the “awww” factor of one-year-old Mark (Mk III, given that his dad is Mark Jr. in his family), born last year during Lock & Load to attend at just one day old. This year, Mk III came dressed as a pint-sized shredder with vocal chords to match. (The hood on the costume was apparently quite uncomfortable.)

Brenton in his Gorman di Wulfe outfit was well received, as was thirteen-year-old Sammy in his one-man Choir of Menoth costume. And as if one Protectorate costume weren’t enough, our top two cosplayers for the evening both came as righteous Menoth followers.

Diana Engelhardt was magnificently dressed up as the female version of High Allegiant Amon Ad-Raza, and was perfectly intimidating as such. Even more impressive, she contemplated her costume for the better part of a year but only began work on it in April, less than two months before the contest itself.

And our winner was . . . James Moreland, a Press Ganger and Privateer Press judge, came as the Testament of Menoth, right down to his glowing axe, his light-up stacks, and his carefully inscribed tablet Omegus. He was a big hit with the judges (Douglas Seacat, Kelsey Fox, James Arbuthnot, and returning professional cosplayer Allie Rose-Marie Leost), and for his talent, he earned a gift certificate to the Lock & Load store!

Okay, so to wrap up with the joke I started the cosplay contest with . . .

Popcorn guru Orville Redenbacher was actually a WARMACHINE player. Interestingly, every time he played he wore special shoes made of his own product, the Movie Butter-Flavored brand. That way, when the time was right, he could literally pop his feet.

It remains to be seen if I’ll be back to host next year . . .